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Ficlet: Breaking Character
DB/ED Hands - lerdo
only_more_love
Title: Breaking Character
Rating: T
Pairing: David Boreanaz/Emily Deschanel (implied)
Characters:  Primarily Emily Deschanel
Genre: Angst, RPF
Word Count:  440
A/N:  This has been niggling at me for a while now. 
Spoilers: 
None

Click here for fic index.

Emily is in Petit Trésor, her arms full of soft blue onesies for a friend’s upcoming baby shower when it hits her:  she is that woman – the other woman. 

Jaime stands on the other side of the store, alone, skin glowing from her, David, and Jaden’s recent family vacation in Mexico.  And maybe from that other thing, the thing that Emily and David never discuss, beyond a whispered “Congratulations” and a dry “Thanks.” 

Jaime fingers a fluffy pink blanket, a secretive smile flirting around the edges of her mouth.  So she’s having a girl.  They’re having a girl.  Jaime is carrying another life inside her.  A life that she and her husband created.  A sister for Jaden, probably an apple-cheeked daddy’s girl for David. 

He didn’t tell her they were having a girl. 

She doesn’t know why that should bother her, but it does.  Her hands shake and her stomach roils.  She thinks she might be sick right there; she couldn’t bear it if Jaime saw her.  Barely aware of what she’s doing, Emily drops the bundle of tiny clothes on a display table and stumbles out of the store. 

Outside, the afternoon sun nearly blinds her with its cheerfulness.  Her fingers fumble through her purse until they brush cool metal.  She pulls out her sunglasses and shoves them on, silently hoping they’ll hide the wetness in her eyes as she collides with a truth she’s been hiding from herself for too long.

He didn’t tell her they were having a girl. 

But why should he?  They’re not married.  They’re not even dating.  Every time her mind has tried to supply the words for what they’re doing, she’s danced away from them.  Now she mouths them silently, tasting ashes and something sour:  they’re having an affair. 

She’s having an affair with a married man.

Warm fingers slipping along her spine, and lower, can’t make up for that fact.  Four seasons of playing Dr. Temperance Brennan, and Emily realizes she’s taken a page from her character’s book.  She’s compartmentalized her life, dropping the David who kisses her despite her halfhearted protests, into a box that’s entirely separate from the David who goes home to kiss his pretty blonde wife and towheaded son. 

It’s an arbitrary distinction, one that Brennan might have been able to make several seasons ago.  Maybe even one that David can continue to make. 

But it’s not one that she can make…Not anymore. 

Her phone rings in her purse, and she knows who it is even before she looks at the number, trusting an intuition that the character she plays, distrusts.  Mouth trembling, she lets it keep ringing. 

A/N:  Feel free to friend me for fic updates. :)


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Loved it, especially with the juxtaposition of 9 Crimes. Beautiful song.

Thanks! And yes, it is a beautiful song. Achingly so...

Just heartbreaking and fantastic...oh, man!!! I want to roll this around in my head like I'd roll a sour lime Altoid around in my mouth, savoring every shift from sweet to sour and back again.

*smooch* You give good comment, you know that? *g* Thank you, honey.

OMG! LERDO! YOU WROTE DEMILY!!!

And such a heartbreaking one at that!

Every time her mind has tried to supply the words for what they’re doing, she’s danced away from them. Now she mouths them silently, tasting ashes and something sour: they’re having an affair.

My goodness, how crazily beautiful and sad that all is. You just broke my heart.

You have to join the comm, babe. You can't WRITE demily and not join the comm. That's just...insanity.

But whatever you do, I admire you for touching on this very sad and angsty subject.:)

Thanks for taking the time to let me know what you thought of this, Jamie; I really appreciate it. I'm happy this made you sad. Oh, you know what I mean. ;)

I did join the comm. You know, I'm still not sure I actually SHIP those two, but this particular idea wouldn't let me go. I liked the realness of it, if that makes any sense. If D/E are together, they're having an affair. And affairs have consequences, emotional and otherwise...

Thank you again!

oh, sorry - I meant that in a good way! :-)

I thought you were always kind of ambivalent about this pairing but L: you shoot, you hit. DAMN, woman!

The implosion of the compartmentalization and the circumstances of it are excllently done. Talk about a reality check, sheesh. *wipes cold sweat off brow*

So....joining the dark side? :-D

No worries; I didn't take your comment in a bad way. And if you HAD meant it that way, that would've been ok too. We're all entitled to our opinions. :)

You're right; I was -- and am -- ambivalent about D/E. I've never written any RPF, period, before, and I tend to not read it, simply because it doesn't generally interest me. To be honest, I'm still not sure I actually ship D/E, but as I said to Jamie, this idea grabbed hold of me and wouldn't let go. If D/E are together, they're having an affair. And affairs have consequences, emotional and otherwise...

Talk about a reality check, sheesh.

I love that you used the word reality, as a big part of what drew me to writing this is the idea of what it would really mean if they're really having an affair. Know what I mean?

Thank you for commenting. I've never written anything close to RPF before, and I'm glad to know this wasn't a total clunker. :)

So....joining the dark side? :-D

I'm still ambivalent. But I've clearly dipped my toes in. *g*

O_O
Holy hell, you just wrote RPF?!
*bounces*
Welcome to the dark side. It's (ironically) shiny here.

(Sorry, I have no real comments on the actual fic as I'm not a Demily person, but YAY nonetheless. *g*)

LMAO Yep, it appears I did write RPF. Now if you'd just show me yours. *g*

No worries on the lack of comments specifically about the ficlet. :) I'm still not really a Demily person either, but the idea of them being together, and the real implications of that, captured my interest.

Oh, you went there. Have you ever gone there before? If so, I MUST READ!!!

*g* Yes, I went there. Alas, I have not gone there before. This one popped my RPF cherry.

(Deleted comment)
:P Yep, guilty as charged. I just couldn't shake the idea of the implications of their actually being together.

Thanks for commenting, especially since you said it's been a while since you've read E/D.

I actually favor the true-to-life angsty Dem, hon... and it really doesn't get much more heartbreakingly real than this. I heart you for feeling this, for writing it, and even more for putting it out there. You really jumped into the deep end with both feet and I love it!! Hope there just might be more where this came from... :)

Oh god, it hurts my heart.

Yet it's still so gorgeous. You paint such a vivid picture, bring the emotions to life flawlessly.

Four seasons of playing Dr. Temperance Brennan, and Emily realizes she’s taken a page from her character’s book. She’s compartmentalized her life, dropping the David who kisses her despite her halfhearted protests
That realization is just so heartbreakingly perfect. *sighs*

Fantastic job, L. It's always nice to read something from you, but some Demily was a great surprise. :)

nooooooo. no hell for the divine ms. l! Okay, well, maybe a little hell, but it is LOVELY this time of year, I PROMISE. and we are very welcoming -- lots of your LJ friends are there.

SAY HI TO LERDO EVERYONE!! :)

your writing is so fabulous. this breaks my heart. but in a way... the fact that you may have joined us on the dark side heals it back up a bit. :)

She’s having an affair with a married man. what a heart-breaking realization. i love how all of us are like "if my husband ever cheated on me i would kill him. kill him until he died from it." and then we're like "BUT EMILY YOU MAY DO WHATEVER YOU WISH, HERE LET US HELP YOU." Sigh.

i love it.

Emily is just so awesome that I could forgive her anything. :)

RPF?! Ahh as if I needed a reason to love your writing more. :)


Oh lord... that HURTS!

He didn’t tell her they were having a girl.

Okay... you just pretty much ripped my heart out and stomped on it good. This was just - so beautifully written, and so painfully real. It makes me wonder what comes next for them... how they'll work together after she breaks it off.

Wow... as usual... you absolutely floor me with your talent!

Beautiful. I didn't know you wrote Demily, but you have to keep on, my friend. This is good!

God, this hurt...but so good! Your fics always leave such an impact in so little space. This is beautiful and I really loved it!

And finally Lerdo gets into Demily!!!

Good for you.

And amazingly written.

Please some more. Please????