Maybe you're unhappy and wish someone would just tell you they give a damn that you're alive. Maybe a family member is sick, and you believe in the power of strangers' prayer. Maybe you need a book, and you don't have the money to buy it right now; someone else might be willing to send you a free, used copy. Maybe you're having a horrible, no-good day, and you wish someone would write you a super-fluffy Bones fic. There are many wants and needs, from the tangible to the intangible.
It occurs to me that maybe we can help each other.
If you or someone you know need something, reply to this post with a request. (If you're feeling shy, post anonymously. I'm allowing anon comments, but I'm going to screen them and then manually approve them, in case of spam.) If you see a request that you can fill, reply to that comment. Feel free to share this post with anyone you think might be interested.
Maybe none of you need anything, in which case this post will quietly die. :)
Let me know if you have any questions. This is a half-formed yet fully-well-intentioned idea, but I'll do my best to clarify as needed.
You ARE a good person, and you ARE loved. And you can write.
Sometimes people don't demonstrate their love for us in the particular ways that we most need; that doesn't negate their love. If it's possible, try and ask for what you truly need from your loved ones. We wish people could read our minds sometimes; they can't. But maybe ask... They might surprise you -- in a good way.
If you want to write, keep pushing through whatever doubts and fears are coming up, and just put down one word in front of another. I know how hard that can be sometimes. But your words and your take on a story are yours, and they have value. (Tell the stories you want to tell, and don't let anyone stop you -- least of all yourself.) Not everyone will read them the same way, or even like them, but they still mean something.
If it's a matter of thinking you need to be better at it, I can promise you that the only way to improve your writing is to write. I have to remind myself of that a lot. :)
I'm so sorry so many people around you haven't been able to show you and haven't been showing you that they feel that about you.
*hugs*
And, from what I've seen, you can write. If you need a cheerleader/sounding board, I certainly don't mind doing that.
Hugs to you.
ETA: I sincerely hope those easier days are here for you soon. Constant turmoil is exhausting.
Edited at 2011-02-24 02:52 pm (UTC)
a) keep on doing the higher dose of Advair and regular albuterol hits and tessalon and phenylephedrine that I started yesterday (with likely added benadryl tonight),
b) start right back on the nebulizer tonight despite the fact that my albuterol ampules are expired, or
c) go directly onto the prednisone and cut to the chase
[or d) go and beg for anti-biotics even though I'm pretty sure it's allergies/asthma].
But otherwise I'm doing pretty great.
Oh, and if I actually found a pair of cute, work-appropriate, comfortable brown dress shoes in a size 8, that'd be good, too.
Thank you for this post. Hugs to you.
...and that it's okay to listen to my heart rather than the chatter of what everyone else wants.
It is. It really is. I'm giving you permission, for what it's worth. ($.01, maybe?) *g* You know yourself best. Not everyone else will have your very best interests at heart. Some will; many won't.
I'll keep an eye out on the shoe front. Have you checked out shoebuy.com? I think people review the shoes, and there's free shipping and return shipping, in case you don't like whatever you buy. Not the same as trying shoes on in-store, but there's a big selection.
Thank you for this post. Hugs to you.
You're welcome. *hugs you back*
Sometimes I need to know that my presence matters. That, since it will all end eventually anyhow, there's a reason not to press fast-forward. That there's a point to caring for myself.
I need to know what people mean when they say they care, when they say "I love you." I know what I mean; I don't know what they mean.
I need to know if I have anything to offer, whether I'm a good person, and if I'll ever feel like I have a place in this world that isn't separate from everyone else.
You have so much to offer, you are a good person and you will find your place in the world. Don't give up.
Hugs to you.